New Blog... New Beginnings

Please visit our new famiy blog at: http://www.adaywithmygrays.blogspot.com/

We will no longer be posting to grayadoption.blogspot.com please make changes and save our new blog site on your favorites.

Thanks,
The Gray's

Welcome

Dylan Thomas Gray

Born: September 16, 2009

1:01 pm

9lbs 2oz and 22 inches long

God is good all the time!!

It has been a difficult week for my family

but we are so thankful for God's love

that has carried us through.

I am so thankful and blessed to have

3 wonderful children and one one the way.

I am so thankful for my husband

and the love we share.

I am thankful for the trials that

God puts me through.

It has given me strength.

It has given me wisdom.

It has brought me closer than ever

to my Lord and Savior.

I am thankful I serve a mighty God that protects me from those who try to do harm.

I am thankful the truth was made known today.

I am thankful my children were able to see the Lord at work.

I pray for those who have done us wrong.

I forgive you for all the unnecessary trauma you caused my family.

I plan to continue to educate others on the issues families face with internationally adopted older children through this blog. I hope this will help others to not only understand our daughter but to be sensitive to the challenges these children face and understanding of the trauma they have been through.

In closing I leave you with this:

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. James 1:27

All Glory be to God:)

Precious Promises

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. Gal 2:20

Ah Lord GOD! behold, thou hast made the heaven and the earth by thy great power and stretched out arm, and there is nothing too hard for thee Jer 32:17

And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive Mt. 21:22

We must learn to believe God's exceeding great and precious promises. It will change the way we pray and it will change the way we live!

Finger Painting

I can't believe I am about to post a picture of my big fat Buddha belly for the world to see

But.... my kids had so much fun

And... they are all so darn cute...

So...

here goes nothing:)

Back to School Fun

We got a chance to visit the McWayne's Science Center last week before school starts back.

As you can see.. the kids had lots of fun!

Family Day 2009

Playing Catch up- Colin's First Soccer Camp

Colin's first year of soccer... I don't know who is more excited... Colin or Chad. I have a love/hate relationship with soccer season. I love to watch my children play and have fun but I hate to lose my wonderful husband too. Chad is on the board of AYSO and spend so much time away from home getting things set up for the season. He spends countless hours working on the soccer paper (Touchlines), training coaches, selecting teams, board meetings, and coaching Bethany and Colin's teams. When he is home he spends his time on the phone with parents and coaches OR watching every soccer game that comes on tv...agh! There is a lot of work that goes into all that fun! He loves it so much so who am I to compalin:) I will get him back in a few months;)

Colin was more interested in catching up with his buddy from school than playing.

HE is a talker just like his dad:)

A year later...

Gotcha Day 2008 Sorry no pics for 2009.. we are having computer difficulties!

It’s been a year… and what a year it’s been:) It is amazing to look back and see how much we have all changed. Yes, Chad and I have probably aged 10 years in this year but worth every bit of it:) We have also grown so much… as a family, as individuals, and most importantly we have all grown closer to Christ.

1 Thessalonians 5:18
“give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

We started this journey with a leap of faith… trusting in God’s plan for us… trusting God to provide for us… trusting God to give us wisdom and strength. Afraid? Yes! Very afraid in what the future held for us but obedient enough to accept His calling. We have seen mountains moved, miracles happen, and blessing poured down upon us.


2 John1:6 And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.


Our biggest challenge in this all has been to die to self and live in God’s will. We have fought a daily battle of what we want and what God wants. It really didn’t matter how well we prepared ourselves for a special needs child with low IQ… living and accepting our daughter’s special need has been more challenging than we ever imagined. It is only natural for a parent to want their child to succeed. It is only natural to hope and pray that the child you adopt will blossom into a healthy, happy, well-adjusted child once in the home of their loving forever family. Well, that is not always God’s plan and accepting this truth is a lot easier said than done.

Mark 8:34-35 (NIV) Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me and for the gospel will save it."

Living and loving a child with special needs hasn’t been easy. It was not love at first sight. The love has slowly grown but it has definitely been a process for us all. We find ourselves constantly questioning what is best for Anna Li. On the outside looking in she is truly a happy child full of love, life, and hope. On the inside looking out is a confused child full of hurt, anger, pain, and resentment. Her beautiful smile and sparkling eyes are covering up a lot of stress, anxiety, and depression. The emotional baggage that she carries affects her ability to learn and her short term memory. What she learns today is gone tomorrow. How many times do we teach her the ABC’s, her phone number, and address? How is this fair to her after all she has been through? Why isn’t our love enough to heal the pain? Why is it so hard for her to love us? Could this be God’s plan? Are we strong enough to carry this cross?

2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (New International Version)
16Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

I have been told by a dear friend that when we maximize our problems we tend to minimize God… how true that is. God is here and has never left us. We do not know what plans the Lord has for Anna Li but I can clearly see the Lord has a magnificent plan for her. The love she has for the Lord is amazing. The prayers she prays are nothing but from the heart. Does it really matter that her IQ is low? No, God can do amazing things through anyone who is willing to serve Him and nothing can stand in the way. I believe in my heart that the Lord can and will heal her heart and allow her to find peace with her life in China and happiness with her new life and family in America. He will restore her soul and help her to find love for us. No, we are not strong enough to carry this cross… but He is. This is His plan for us to die to ourselves and live for Him.

Colossians 3:15
And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful.


So, as we celebrate this day we are humbled, thankful, and grateful for what the Lord has done in our lives. We are thankful for these trials for they have opened our eyes and allowed us to grow as Christians. We are thankful the Lord has entrusted us with this child and allowed us to adopt her into our family as He has adopted us into His. We are so thankful for her desire to know Him. How blessed we are!!

But someone will say, 'You have faith and I have works.' Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works." James 2:18

As we continue on life’s journey we ask you to continue lifting us up in prayer. Pray the Lord will continue to work on Anna Li so that she will be able to break free from the pain she carries and live for Him. Pray that we will continue to die to ourselves and live for Him. Pray that the people in our life will understand and respect our decisions we make for Anna Li in order to help her attach to her family and grow close to us.

Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it.

John 14:13-14

In closing, I want to say… we may have missed Anna Li’s first tooth, first word, and first steps but we have had a wonderful year of first in America:

1. First trip to the dentist.

2. First trip to the beach.

3. First trip to Disney Word.

4. First trip to Sea World.

5. First trip to the orthodontist to be fitted for braces.

6. First family reunion (including lots of hugs from great aunts).

7. First year in an American School.

8. First time in church.

9. First time in Vacation Bible School.

10. First time celebrating holidays with family!

11. First time trick-or-treating.

12. First time on the Polar Express.

13. First trip to the movie theater.

14. First trip to the Atlanta Zoo.

15. First time hiking.

16. First and last time eating Spaghetti O’s. (Yuck!)

17. First time hunting Easter Eggs.

18. First birthday party.

19. First time grounded.

20. Fist time making smores…. (Almost a recreation of Denise the Menace!)

And many more first to come!!

Happy 4th!!

One word to describe my day..... EXHAUSTING!! I guess that is expected from a 7 month pregnant lady on a hot summer day:)

We did not have our usual 4th of July Celebration at the Kickers. This pregnancy is draining every inch of life out of me so we decided to just stay at home this year and take it easy... yea right! The kids were dying to play our traditional 4th of July games so we made our own version of the Kicker Celebration. We had a water balloon toss (followed by a water balloon fight), the egg toss, and of course (Bethany's favorite) BINGO!

Chad and Anna Li won the water balloon toss. Bethany was giving them their prize!! Followed by a water balloon fight. Colin wanted his picture made with a water balloon. He had no idea everyone was standing behind him ready to attack:) Chad and Colin won the egg toss and Bethany and Anna Li dominated the BINGO games. Keeping with tradition.... I didn't win anything:)
After our games Chad took the kids swimming and left me at home to rest.... only I didn't rest. I cleaned the bathroom, washed some clothes, changed the sheets on the bed..... and then took a quick nap before they came home.

We had a little cookout tonight, shot a little fireworks for the kids, and ended the day with movies, brownies, and homemade ice cream.

Here are some pics from our BIG fireworks show:)

Brace yourselves for the big finale.......

Not to bad for a grand total of $31.00:)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA!!

GOD BLESS THE USA

Happy Father's Day

Sorry, no pics this time around. I can't seem to remember the camera these days! We took Chad out last night to Joe's Crab Shack.... oh so good! We had yummy food and a really good time. Oh how I wish I had pictures to share..

Tonight Chad and the kids went out to eat. I am stuck at home eating my wonderful pregnancy diet food as I get ready for my 3 hour sugar test on Tuesday. Let's pray I pass because I am really not liking all this healthy food...

We spent the day at my parent's house (since Chad was at work) and had a yummy Sunday dinner with them... grilled chicken fingers, brown rice, cabbage, broccoli, green beans, and sugar free banana pudding for dessert. Pretty good for diet food:) We ended the day there with a heated political debate between father and daughter... got to love that:) Happy Father's Day Dad!

And most important for last.... Happy Father's Day Chad! I am so lucky to have you in my life. You are a wonderful father and husband. I simply adore you.

Neat Fundraisers

I have a very talented blogger friend that is raising money

to bring her adorable 13 year old daughter home from China.

Go on over to http://joyunspeakableandfullofglory.blogspot.com and check it out:)

While you are there you will see her sweet Lucy Joy!

She was on the same waiting list as Anna Li.

Ok, now, go on over and check her out...

she has some really cute stuff:)

BUT

Don't forget about my friend Vickie either...

she is selling raffle tickets on a Nintendo Wii and an Apple Ipod.

Tickets are $10 each

you can find them at:

http://wwwourchinagirl.blogspot.com/

Look what I found at the Dragon Boat Festival!!

We had a wonderful day at the Dragon Boat Festival with our Athens FCC Group! Anna Li made her first "best" friend in America! She is adopted as well and has Chinese parents. Her mother teaches Chinese classes in Huntsville so both the girls were able to talk in Chinese to each other. They had so much fun together:) Anna Li got invited to come to her house next weekend for a Chinese cooking class with other 11-13 year old girls adopted from China. How fun is that!?!?!?! This is Alabama so don't be expecting a traditional Dragon Boat Race:) We make do with our plastic boats and the kids had a blast!!

Colin made a buddy too! Colin and Paul William are 2 months apart and became fast friends:)

More pics from the boat races!!!!

End of May Ramblings

I know I am becoming a horrible blogger!! I think this makes the second post in May... and no pictures. I am awful! We are all alive and well. I am now 6 months pregnant and dreading the summer. We are all officially out of school for the summer and yet things have not slowed down. We are putting in lots of hours helping Anna Li with her English and school. The first week away from school and she has learned how to spell the numbers one- ten. Next week is days of the week... it will be challenging! She understands almost all conversations but is not able to speak as much as she understands. She has some speech difficulties and gets stuck on words often. It is very frustrating for her but we practice daily and pray she can over come this. We continue to go to therapy once a month and it is very helpful for us all. We are still struggling with attachment and have a lot of set back. We take it one day at a time. She has an appointment with the Eye Foundation in July and we are looking forward to seeing Dr. Cogen. Anna Li has started a journal and spends time each day writing her thoughts down. I hope this will help her healing processes and at the same time give her some practice in writing English. She is learning small task around the house such as washing dishes, help with cooking, and sweeping. She loves the cooking part but gives me a hard time when it comes to the chores part:) She won a $50 Wal-Mart gift card from her school and so we went on a shopping spree. She bought several outfits, a paint set, the baby an outfit (how sweet of her), and some popcorn chicken from the deli:) She had lots of fun and did all the adding in her head to see how much she had left to spend. I think in the end she had about .94 left on the card. As for Bethany, she has finished the 4th grade. She is taking a gardening class with the local 4H club this summer as well as a cooking class. Colin has finished 3 year preschool and is happy as can be... as long as his buddy Luke is around to play.

Continue to remember us in prayer as we search for the right things that well help Anna Li grow into the girl she needs to be. Pray the school will understand her situation and treat it the way it should be. She will continue to be in the care of a lot of specialist as we try to understand the depth of her disabilities. Pray the Lord will guide us in the decisions we have to make regarding her health and education. Most importantly pray for Anna Li. If you see her you will see a huge smile and so many people think she is the happiest girl on earth but what they do not realize is that smile is covering a lot of pain. She struggles with stress, anxiety, and depression every minute of the day and the only way she knows how to deal with it is smile.

Lastly, I want to remind everyone that although Anna Li is a very loving and lovable child, extra attention such as hugs, gifts, and praise from others than her mom and dad create confusion, stress, and anxiety for Anna Li. We have so many that do not understand this, will not understand this, and refuse to cooperate with us. The easiest way for me to explain is: Anna Li has no concept of what a mother, a father, a grandparent, a friend, teacher, or stranger is. A hug from mom means nothing when everyone she meets gives her hugs. In her head that is just as common as a handshake. Anna Li is incapable of telling the difference in strangers and friend, good person and bad... and this can be scary! In order for her to develop healthy attachments she needs to be able to attach to her parents and for the first time in her life discover what LOVE is. She has been home 10 months and she does not know. To her love is someone that gives you a gift, or a hug, or is nice to you. If you hug her (in her mind) she loves you AND if you punish her for doing wrong then (in her mind) she no longer loves you. We try to tell her, the therapist tries to tell her, but it just doesn't seem to click in her head. I guess this is what happens when NO ONE ever hugs you, kisses you, or shows you love the first 12 years of your life. It is detrimental to her future and her well being to learn to attach in a healthy way. So, NO we are not being mean, and YES Anna Li understands this process. She knows she is not suppose to hug but everywhere she goes people are handing them out (with good intentions) like candy and she doesn't know how to deal with this. So, please, please, please... when we are out and about and you see Anna Li... a simple "Hi Anna Li" will do... then feel free to talk to the rest of us. Anna Li needs lots of attention and love right now but only from her parents. As she grows these strong bonds things will change and she can slowly reach out to others. Thanks for your understanding:)

Love,
The Grays

PS-- I am too tired to go back and proof read this so I hope it all makes sense. If you have kept up with me long enough you should be use to my ramblings:)

You Must Check This Out

You must check this out.....
Please take a minute to jump over to my friend Vickie's blog. We share in common the joy of adopting. She and her husband recently adopted a beautiful 13 year old girl. While in China a huge surprise awaited them......you won't believe it.

Go check it out and help if you can.

wwwourchinagirl.blogspot.com

ITS A BOY!!

Looks like we will be welcoming

Dylan Thomas Gray

to our family

in September!!

We are so excited!

Colin was jumping for joy.

The thought of 3 sisters was just too much for him:)

It seems that we are just working our way through the alphabet...

Anna Li

Bethany

Colin

Dylan

Just 22 more kids to go and we will have every letter A-Z:)

What the Future Holds???

Today we are going to discover what our little bundle of joy is!! We took the kids out of school so we can all find out together. Our appointments at 2:30 so come back and visit to learn more about our new member. Leave us a comment to let us know what you think...

Will you be hearing OR

Right now we are leaning towards:
Boy name: Dylan Thomas Gray
Girl name: Isabella (Ella) but can't think of a middle name. Any suggestions???

2nd Post of the day... Easter Pics!

More Vacations Pictures

As I was uploading the Easter pictures I realized I never posted anything about the last day of vacation... opps! Here's some pictures from our last day in Orlando. Anna Li and Colin visited the Rainforest Cafe with Dad while Bethany and I shopped for some Disney Christmas ornaments:)

This pictures is for Chad. He LOVES Ireland! Maybe we will get to go one day:)

Yes, this is my son entering an Irish Pub... he insisted on the picture because his Dad had the same picture made:)

All Legos... isn't it amazing!! Each kids picked out their favorite lego statue to stand by....

Bethany chose the sea creatures..

Anna Li chose the crab...

Colin chose the Storm Trooper....

and Dad chose the Sea dragon! Great fun but ohhh so tiring. Great to be home:)

A Day at the Doctor

Today Anna Li and I went to visit the International Adoption Clinic. I took off work and Anna Li skipped school because this is an all day process. She was tested once again to see how far she has come since she first arrived in America. Her scores were right where the specialist expected them to be. Of course she will not be on the level of all 13 year old but she is doing good and making progress. It will take many years for her to get where she needs to be but with time and patients (lots of patients) she will get there. We had a wonderful therapy session with the attachment therapist and made great progress with the attaching and bonding process. We have agreed to go back and visit once a month to help keep us on the right path and learn new ways to help make our mother-daughter bond stronger. The physical part of the exam was also good. Anna Li is a very healthy little girl. Next month we will go to the Eye Foundation for her eye check-up and to the orthodontist for a consultation for braces. We completed our visit around 3:00 and we were starving and ready for lunch. I was going to take Anna Li to her parents favorites restaurant when I got a call from my mom..... "Bethany fell and hit her head at school! It had been over an hour and it was still bleeding.... oh, and by the way she was feeling dizzy!" Uhhhh, hello!!! Take her to the emergency room, I will meet you there!! We spent 3 hours at our wonderful local emergency room (NOT)! The fully staffed one doctor was there to take care of every ones emergency medical needs#%&*#!!!!! They finally arrived and took the 2 seconds to look at her and report she was ok (thank God).



Help me figure this out... if the doctor spend 2 minutes with each patient... how come it take 3 hours to be seen. What do they do???? Go play a round of golf and each lunch between patients?



It was a wonderful way to spend my last day of vacation and now I have about 10 loads of laundry to do before bed:)

Sea World

I know this should come last but it is a pain when you have to post a lot of pictures:) Anyway, this is Colin after Sea World. I feel like he looks right now!! EXHAUSTED!!!!

The kids at the shark exhibit. Anna Li was fascinated by the aquarium that you walk through. She seen and learned so much today! Mrs. Raney would be proud:)

Touching the Sting Rays!!!

Look at their faces.... they were waiting in line for a ride but their faces look like they are not so sure they want to ride. I know Anna Li didn't but she was just doing it because Bethany was:) We laughed so hard at the look on her face as she rode some of these rides....shear terror!!! but she insisted on riding if Bethany rode.

Every ones favorite part was the Shamu show! It was fabulous!!!! The kids were disappointed that Shamu the whale did not splash us but I was a little relieved!!

Today was the last day of our trip! I will be sporting a red neck (sunburn) back to Alabama but somehow that sounds appropriate:) Just Kidding!!!!